TELL ME A STORY: "Make You Feel Beautiful"

"She looks in the mirror and sees this terrible person, and everything she sees breaks my heart. I want her to look through her big beautiful blue eyes and see what I see... How she is beautiful and amazing and perfect... Her soul, everything about her inspires me to be a better person."

Have you ever met someone who isn't able to see how amazing they really are? A young woman I met on Tumblr told me about a close friend of hers like this. She was grasping to put into words exactly what her friend meant to her. 

So I helped her write this song.

LYRICS:

You look around through pretty blue eyes
And see all the things that you despise
But baby take a look through mine
Listen to these words:

I want to make you feel loved
Make you feel beautiful
That you would know the worth of your heart
And I want to kiss your scars

You may not see it but everybody knows
that shining from you is the warmest, sweetest glow
So baby stand up tall and sure
and let your fire burn

[CHORUS]

One day I hope you believe
when I say and truly mean
that you are breathtaking inside and out
And may these words fall heavy on your doubt

La - de - da
La - de - da
I just can't find the words to say 
how incredible you are

[CHORUS]

TELL ME A STORY: "Relationships"

"I've never loved anyone so much. We had our future planned together. I loved him. Ecstatic. Perfect. Happy. In love. Then, heartbroken. Devastated. Alone. Cheated. Lied to. Like I meant nothing to him. Like there's no point to love anymore. I don't want to have relationships. There's no point."

Meet Megan. She contacted me with a heartbreaking tale of young love gone awry. 

A boy had asked her out and though she initially had trepidation, she agreed to give it a shot. They ended up dating and fell deeply for one another, spending all their time together and becoming best friends. Unfortunately, there was another "best friend" - a girl he spent a lot of time with, one that he had actually had a crush on for years. Although she had suspected they had crossed the line, she gave them the benefit of the doubt. But the inappropriate interactions continued. And so she left him.

Can you guess what happened next? As you can imagine, the two "friends" ended up together. Obviously Megan experienced a flood of emotions and reached out to me in the depth of her pain to help lay these feelings out in a song.

My guess is that even if you've never experienced this situation directly, you have known heartbreak at some point in your life. And there's a good chance at that moment you made a (temporary) decision to close your heart and to swear off relationships for good. You decided that the pain of being devastated and laid out flat on the floor isn't worth whatever pleasure that love brings.

This is a song for those occasions.

LYRICS:

I had my doubts but you won me anyway
"Take my hand; it's gonna be ok."
Days passed by, we built a true thing together
And grew to believe we had found our forever

But that's not the end, is it?
See you had this "friend"
You said my worries were untrue
But who did you run to
after I left you?

Oh, oh, oh, oh - I don't want relationships no more
I can do this on my own
I won't live life from the floor 

Way to prove me right, way to show your colors
You lied or you're weak - it's one or the other
Never been more hurt, never felt so cheated
The song that you hear is the sound of me bleeding

Oh, oh, oh, oh - I don't want relationships no more
I can do this on my own
I won't live life from the floor  

Can anybody out there please explain
just what is worth this needless pain?
I walked away with scars, you walked away with her
It's time I sealed this heart off from the hurt

No, no, no, no - I don't want relationships no more... 

Oh, oh, oh, oh - I don't want relationships no more
I can do this on my own
I won't live life from the floor  

NEW PROJECT: "Tell Me a Story..."

Exactly TWO years ago today I announced my plan for One Love, One Year - the songwriting project where I wrote, performed, produced and posted one love song a week for an entire year. 

Today I'm stoked to be announcing my next effort:

"TELL ME A STORY, I'LL WRITE YOU A SONG"

Everyone has a story. There are parts of YOUR life narrative that are chocked full of adventure, drama, disappointment, terror, joy, sadness, humor and bliss.

I would love to hear about it. 

And I would love to write a song with you.

Full details and more information RIGHT HERE. I can't wait to work with you! Let's go!

New Form of Man

What's up friends, it's been a while since I've posted anything new, but I'm certainly glad to be back!

Obviously by now you know that I have interest in producing and performing in a wide variety of genres and styles. Even though I've written everything from acoustic ballads to reggae to Motown in the past, with this new track I experimented with Industrial Rock, a la Nine Inch Nails. It's certainly a new direction for me but I really enjoyed playing around with this sort of energy and vibe. Hope you enjoy!

LYRICS:

All the cowards run, two lovers with a gun
Fueled by a vision to ignite a new sun
Blowing planets open like a mind-blowing drug
Crushing lies like wrecking balls; the new world's begun

Add a little bit of conscious motion
Add a little bit of 'don't give a damn'
Add a little bit of violent passion
These are the makings of a new form of man

The time has now at last come
For us to rise and become
What we're meant to
This is why we're here; This is why we were sent at all
Lo, the time is at hand
Our obstacles will not stand
We will cut through
Burnin' down the old ways and making way for something new

Tearin' down the terrors that no longer serve us
Birthing new creations that will bring forth light
Murdering the monsters that have held us captive
Brandishing our gifts as a new way to fight

Add a little bit of fierce compassion
Add a little bit of 'don't give a ..."
Add a little bit imagination
We don't wait for fate, we create our own luck

The time has now at last come
For us to rise and become
What we're meant to
This is why we're here; This is why we were sent at all
Lo, the time is at hand
Our obstacles will not stand
We will cut through
Burnin' down the old ways and making way for something new

Getcha Some!

My year-long project One Love, One Year is now available on iTunes and various other retailers. Get a copy of the album which includes FIFTY songs for just $9.99. Thanks so much for everyone's love, comments and feedback over the course of the project. I couldn't have done it without your support!

'One Love, One Year' on iTunes

Music Video: Disease

Brand spankin' new music video for my song "Disease." Click the "Just the Songs" link in the navigation above to download this and many others for free.

Small Handfuls

So ya, 52 songs of mine are kind of a lot to chew on.

With that in mind, starting on Monday of next week I'm going to be posting a new playlist each day at 1pm EST on FACEBOOK featuring a small handful of my similarly themed or similar genre songs.

Your coworkers and family will be so 'jeals' and be all, "OMG - WHO are you listening to?"

Reflections on One Love, One Year

“A bit of advice
Given to a young Native American
At the time of his initiation:
As you go the way of life,
You will see a great chasm. Jump.
It is not as wide as you think.”
― Joseph Campbell

One year ago I was standing at the foothills of a mountain. What was before me looked unscalable but for many reasons I knew I had to start my climb. A song a week was a daunting task indeed. I remember being asked early on if I thought I would make it and to be honest I wasn't quite sure. I often joked that "by around March" there was a chance I would be "licking the walls."

To my surprise, with inspiration around every corner and fueled by my love for writing and producing, after hundreds of hours stuck inside while my friends were out enjoying life, mentally taking the challenge one week at a time, I reached my goal. One love song a week, 52 in total, written and produced - for an entire year.

I learned a lot about love, a lot about myself, a lot about songwriting. I learned that even when you think the well is dry - if you push through - there is often something beautiful just on the other side of your resistance.

Many people have asked "What now?" First, over the next couple of months I am going to be reorganizing this site and while "One Love, One Year" will be a part of it, it will also include new music, in-depth reflections on my songs and songwriting and much more. I hope you'll stay with me for the next leg of this journey. I will be also doing some regional touring in the southeast, producing and writing for other artists and exploring several professional options.

Many thanks to all of you who have made this trek with me. I literally couldn't have done it without your support and feedback. I sincerely hope you've connected emotionally with these songs and maybe even worked through some of your own "stuff" because of them. Or... at the very least you've been entertained.

So now after a long and often difficult climb, here I stand at the top of the mountain. It is not the end of the hike, however. I've not written my final song; this is only the beginning. Here on this cliff I only have two options - retreat and be satisfied with my accomplishments... or jump. I don't know exactly where I'll land - how the future is going to unfold or where this music will lead - but I'll be damned if I've come this far to stop now. It's time to jump.

3... 2... 1...

Song #52: I Will

"Omnia vincit Amor" [Virgil]

Here we are: week 52, the sunset, the finish line, the final song. Next week I'll be back with a recap on One Love, One Year but this week I'm going to refrain from saying too much and let this song speak for itself. I believe these lyrics, in their almost elementary simplicity, say enough.


LYRICS:

In your youth, dear, while you are able-
young and dancing upon the tables
I will be here
I will love you
I will

While you serve your purpose and live your passions
And share your love light with all the masses
I'll support you
I will love you
I will

When you need a challenge and a firm hand
or would rather be held, let me hold your head
I will lead you
I will love you
I will

When you can't do it and you need some help
When our bodies slow down with ailing health
I will be there
and I will love you
I will

And when we're old, dear, and it all fades
And you can no longer dance upon this stage
I will carry you
I will carry you
I will

Hey! Tickle Your OWN Ivories!

This week's song - #51 "La Pelea" - is a modern classical piano composition that flirts with jazz and dabbles in Rachmaninoff-esque large chords and low ocatve stabs. In case there were any pianists among you, I decided to throw up the score for this piece and encourage you to have a go at it. Enjoy!

Click here to download the 3-page PDF (Right-click, "Save As...")

Song #51: La Pelea

"Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent." [Victor Hugo]

Having covered a wide spectrum of genres and textures in "One Love, One Year," as I begin to bring it to a close I find there are still infinite ways that music can speak to us about love. Sometimes - maybe many times - raw, composed, instrumental music can express depths that lyrics and sung words cannot quite reach.

This week I dusted off a classical piano piece that I spent many, many hours composing years ago and finished it up to incorporate into this project. As with anything of this nature, it is open to a variety of interpretations, but to me this piece speaks to love as a sort of violent, yet sweetly playful tussle -- often oscillating between order and chaos, majesty and misery, clarity and confusion.

"The inexpressible depth of music, so easy to understand and yet so inexplicable, is due to the fact that it reproduces all the emotions of our innermost being..." [Oliver Sacks]

PLAY:

Song #50: Deranged

"Thou art to me a delicious torment." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Most people think of love as full of light, joy and positivity. But there is a darker side, that of obsession, craving, intense desire and even torment. Not that those are "bad" things; they are in fact quite delicious... a "burning, yearning devotion" that is felt very deeply.

I don't know whether my mind was subconsciously picking up on all the spooky vibes this time of year or whether it's a cool coincidence, but the fact that Halloween is this week makes this song's lyrics and musical vibe timely and appropriate. Happy Halloween, y'all. I don't have any candy but here's a song for you...

PLAY:

LYRICS:

i am affected, call it wrecked, kid
i am obsessively, madly out of my he-ead
i'm goin' crazy, the way she slays me
i'd make u jealous if I told you how she plays me

it keeps building and building and building up,
and now the volcano's about to erupt
bewitching; she's got me wishing
for an end to all the love spells that she's dishing

what sort of cosmic commotion did i make to deserve this
(that) even when she's gone i am haunted by her ghost?
a boon to give my life back; resurrect my heart
she's a goddess or a demon and either way i'm toast

i'm not superstitious but the jist is
she is enchanting and magically delicious
where did she come from? man I don't know
maybe above... maybe below...

i'm unhinged, unzipped, unbalanced, unglued,
she drives a brother batty and I think that I'm screwed
but i like it, i'll take the pain,
even if i end up quite deranged

Song #49: The Painting

Some time back one of my friends sent me this image - Gustav Klimt's The Kiss - as a sort of inspiration for my "One Love, One Year" songwriting project. I found so much going on and so much emotion in such a simple scene - the kind of rapture that is both passionate as well as sweet. I've since looked at this painting as a sort of target, wanting to aim for nothing less in my personal life.

As for the song, it is very simple and this recording is a bit raw and unpolished... but due to the unassuming nature of my subject, I kind of wanted to keep it that way.

PLAY:

LYRICS:

him left, her right
a soft kindled fire just about to ignite
her swoon, his lead
a hand on the back of her head, fingers on her cheek

i pictured the people in the painting
with envy and disbelief, as merely a fantasy
but now that we're the people in the painting
it turns out that they were right,
love turns gold when it reflects the light

him above, her beneath
face painted warmly with a tender ecstasy
soft curves, hard lines
merge into something that is quite undefined

Song #48: Take Everything

The essence of "Take Everything" is the offering of oneself as a gift to a partner. This could be seen as a purely sexual song, but my intentions were far wider. This type of offering isn't of the self-effacing variety that is born out of weakness - where one is depleting him/herself as a way to solicit approval. Rather it is an invitation from strength, where no matter how much is taken, one's fullness remains. That takes art and mastery, but I believe it is possible.

as deep as deep as deep as deep as you want to go
it goes down deeper, come on in, seeker
it's free, it's free, it's free, it's free, for just you alone
drink all you want to, i know that you want to

take all that you need
here lies the banquet feast
only when you're full can you leave

i want you to have it all
take anything
take everything
push until you've hit your wall
and see that i
have lost nothing

i pour and pour and pour and pour
'till you get your fill
but that doesn't phase me, it's all for your taking
so take and take and take and take
'til you can't take more
i promise you baby, won't stop 'till you're shaking

Song #47: More

"Believe you deserve everything you dream about." -Anon

This track is yet another change in pace - a sensual, haunting downtempo piece about receiving more than you can ask or imagine.

PLAY:

LYRICS:

is it too bold to say
my life has been changed
all from the way
that you have made me believe?
it makes no sense to pray
when something so great
something I can't explain
is more than this mind could conceive

is there more?
pick me off the floor
could I take any more?
i can't wait to see

what i see you see
when i breathe you breathe
when i take the lead
you melt right into me
could you tell me again
where i end, where you begin
and i can't believe
it's happening

is there more?
pick me off the floor
could I take any more?
i can't wait to see

Song #46: Whatever the Dream

"Life is just a funny dream,
and someday I'll share this dream with you..."
[Trey Anastasio, Ether Sunday] 

This week I had the pleasure of cowriting with friend/manager/bandmate Tom Crenshaw, reworking one of his poems into a psychadelic, George Harrison-esque song of hope, cycles and new beginnings.

*Painting by Marc Chagall

PLAY:

LYRICS:

I've been trying to find you,
trying to find you
You've been trying to find me,
trying to find me
All that I'm searching for - is searching for me
trust and we'll see

There's a season to come
a season to come
Rain, it follows the sun
follows the sun
Sunshine follows the rain, night into day
trust in this way

And if I had dreamed this differently
would it be any easier to believe?

Let whatever may come
whatever may come
Dream whatever the dream
whatever the dream
Close and yet far away, near as the end
to where we begin...

And if I had dreamed this differently
would it be any easier to believe?

Song #45: Fireball

I knew that I had come face to face with someone whose mere personality was so fascinating that, if I allowed it to do so, it would absorb my whole nature, my whole soul, my very art itself.
[Oscar Wilde]

PLAY:

LYRICS:

There are thousands of beautiful girls, thousands of shallow pools,
but with her it's different, with her - she's endlessly cool
I think about her all of the time, I recognize the worth in her eyes
And each time we connect we go deeper than we thought we could

She's a fireball, a tempest storm, but I won't quit, no
'Cause I am up for the challenge, gonna show her I can handle it
So let's go, let's go

I had started to lose faith in the world,
didn't think that it made this kind of girl
But then she came out of nowhere and changed up all of the rules
It is gonna take a strong kind of man,
To stand firm while she does her dance
And while others couldn't make it, I am gonna prove that I can

She's a fireball, a tempest storm, but I won't quit, no
'Cause I am up for the challenge, gonna show her I can handle it
So let's go, let's go

I'm longing
to know her heart, to love her flaws,
to touch her body, to shatter her walls
I am all the way in, I won't flinch,
she's worth the fight, she's worth my time,
when you're given a gift, you treat it right

She's a fireball, a tempest storm, but I won't quit, no
'Cause I am up for the challenge, gonna show her I can handle it
So let's go, what are we waiting for?

Song #44: What's Up Now?

"Living well is the best revenge." [George Herbert]

Earlier this year I traveled to Atlanta for an intensive three-day beat making session with musician Joe Aielli. While there we programmed several pop tracks and we've been sitting on this song ever since. This week I decided to write some fun revenge lyrics and finally produce the vocal tracks. Cheers--

LYRICS:

Thought that I wouldn't get on living?
Thought I might be down for the count?
Thought that I wouldn't find the strength to get back up on my feet?
How do you like me now?

Well it just goes to show that you didn't know
what I had inside to get on with my life,
I'm makin' them all say 'Wow!', so what's up now?
You left me behind but one day you'll find
it ain't much fun when I'm number one,
the talk all over town. So what's up now?

When push comes to shove I'm a fighter
I've been down but I got up
And I climbed to the top and I didn't stop,
all beat up, but still on top,
So, how do you like me now?

Well it just goes to show that you didn't know
What I had inside to get on with my life,
I'm makin' them all say 'Wow!', so what's up now?
You left me behind but one day you'll find
it ain't much fun when I'm number one,
the talk all over town. So what's up now?

A little bigger than life and look all the eyes are all on me now
And you thought I'd stay down but I'm back with a sound, so what's up now?
Now I hear you tell your friends that you're sad it's the end
I don't mean to offend, but honey now that you've come 'round,
that door's closed down

Well it just goes to show that you didn't know
What I had inside to get on with my life,
I'm makin' them all say 'Wow!', so what's up now?
You left me behind but one day you'll find
it ain't much fun when I'm number one,
the talk all over town. So what's up now?

Song #43: What We Want

I received an email this week from someone* talking about how "failed" relationships help us to know what it is we truly want moving forward. But more than that, that what we think we want is often a fantasy, a phantom created by our minds. When we're open to new experiences and opportunities, reality has the opportunity to blow away our preconceived ideas.

* Chorus and additional lyrics co-written by Julie Rae Sandifer

PLAY:

LYRICS:

We have been building it up
We hope for something that isn't
We think we know what we want
That is until we get it

For it's an illusion that doesn't exist yet
What we want we will know once we experience it

We'll never get what we want
As long as we think we need it
The only way it will come
Is if instead we choose to give it (and give it, and give it)

For it's an illusion that doesn't exist yet
What we want we will know once we experience it

And all of these moments, all of these people, they're teaching us lessons
they tell us more who we are, what's truly important,
they help us measure in seconds… not minutes… or hours

For it's an illusion that doesn't exist yet
What we want we will know once we've experienced it

Song #42: Disappear

"A mighty pain to love it is,
And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love, but love in vain."
[Abraham Cowley]

LYRICS:

Look at me,
I've got my shit together
I am a winner, a picture of health
but what no one sees deep below the surface
is a cavern, the cold hard walls of a well

For a time I was better, well on my way
A little bit stronger, a little more life each day
But all the momentum I thought I had gained
slows to a halt when someone speaks your name

Sometimes I wish you'd disappear
So maybe I could find peace this year
But I know as sure as I sit here
That I don't mean it

When you both live in the same small town
You can't help but see each other around
I have that old crusty wound that almost heals
But then I catch your eyes and it all at once starts to peel

Sometimes I wish you'd disappear
So maybe I could find peace this year
But I know as sure as I sit here
That I don't mean it

As much as I would like to move on,
it ain't happening
But if I can pretend that you're gone,
there's a respite from all the battling in my mind

Sometimes I wish you'd disappear
So maybe, maybe I could find peace this year
But I know as sure as I sit here
That I don't mean it

...but most times I wish you'd just appear
And wreck all of my plans for this year
Cause when I said my love was sincere
Well, I still mean it